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果绿色の悠伤☆◇◇◇@未央§◎※the green way of thinking about life surrounded※◎§ January 22 well, happy new year then! dear all~Best wishes to dears~
happy cow's year!
i'm turning to my twenties, is there something waiting for me to achieve? I should really do something!
TV series are enjoyable, prison break, gossip girl, precious and extraordinary...love them and they also make me think much.
hold to my various interests.
my study, though not reach the level as good as expected, I cannot lose confidence and action.
same to you.
by the way, welcome to my blog of "special critics of TV series" in www.163.com. my title is also 果绿色的悠伤.
and the address is http://go.ent.163.com/tv/index.html and my comment blog is http://blog.163.com/rio_haruka/
thank you in advance for your important support~ September 02 Happy Summer Is Ending...Newly start again!Every time I come here and write something down, it must be the changing point of a certain period. Now, the weather is getting cooler, it's time to say bye to my summer vacation, such a happy time that I forgot almost all the pressure and unfinished tasks, the fact is that I didn't want to think of them at all, and it's not necessary for me, either.
But I'll be soon faced with next semester, and have to begin my ACCA career. I'm already in the second year of the university. I don't guess I'm well prepared...But I'll make efforts~Making conclusions about my summer, enjoyments took the most time. This is my last third summer holiday!!!Just enjoy it~
I recently joined a TVB group, making friends with articles~TV series also stole my heart.
September has started, I should also set off from now on. June 03 3rd anniversary here!Time flies!
It has been three years in my life. Thanks for leaving me a free and quiet space to write something, though the content of the diary is not very rich, though my original aim to start writing is to improve my English. It's OK.
Happy birthday, my dear space!
I'll try to visit here more. April 26 American History XCathy, Alexendra and I shared feelings after seeing the movie American History X. Three insightful minds~
Thinking about the ending__
Victims always exist, whether they are envolved in the affairs or not.
Hatred is chosen as an attitude of running away from what we should face. It can be an endless and disastrous cycle, swallowing people's sensation of reason.
Misunderstanding has rooted in some people's brain. The vulnerable hearts couldn't bear any seemingly looking-down-upon.
The racism can affect the mind and behavior of society on a large scale, and also harm the students__the hope of future.
February 18 Life in Holidaywiner holiday is ending.
I've finished watching the series of the FILE of JUSTICE on the Valentine's Day, a festival that has no relationship with me, though that day the slight sense of loneliness have struck and upset me a little. Wonderful! I couldn't help sinking into the character description and plots, and write down a 5000-word article to share my feelings.
Quite a long time parting here. I'm tired of sustaining three blogs at the same time. I wanted to give up this one,but I'm not actually willing to part with the space completely. I can't accept the leaving of a lovely place that accompanies me for almost three years, so I come up again.
FeiWoSiCun's novel attracts me once and again. among the many books I read this vacation, I really got shocked by the beautiful words she uses and the surprising end that made me broke my heart.
I planned to study English hard because we will soon be faced with the original English-version major books next semester, but I failed again. I hope I can make the full of the last six days before school opens.
Life in holiday is very enjoyable and relaxed, the ease and comfort I've never experienced, thanks to the small decrease of pressure for the moment, but not for ever. People in youth should not be greedy and cling to an easy life. I must have goals, and then action.
The celebration of Chinese new year gave me the chance to meet my five cousin sisters. One of the sisters discussed the problem of dating with me, wish her a good beginning with that guy.
I'm happy about my handicrafts with a special kind of cloth. this is one of the meaningful things. I use the colourful material to make change bag, flower decorations, Japanese-style fastfood collection, little hanging wares for cellphones and cakes with cream and fruit......Life becomes vigorous~ October 26 University Lifeit's already the end of October now.do i get accustomed to the school life in shanghai now?I don't really know the answer.but i'll try my best to gain,to achieve.
things are beginning to gether.for me ,it's better than before,at least i can find something meaningful and do it.study and activities i think of them both as interesting and the power to build me up.i love the busy life,even though my booklet is full of daily routines,i'd like to learn,to experience.and time passed much faster.
i find english really important for my major,but i'm the person who have the will,but no action,unless i'm under great stress.i should plan my future,i probably know what i want.maybe these can give me perseverence and confidence.to keep on.it's time to set up my mind.
it made me happy that i still can download animations in the dormitory.the similar things feel close to home.
it's not easy to go back home,every four weeks.i miss my parents,my friends and my home so much. October 05 back home!I LOVE HANGZHOU !
hope to find something exciting in university life.
happy to meet SYL JJ.
successfully upload my personal website,http://daisychen.icpcn.com,but still being built...no dead line.
watched the movie love in the mood again.
went to see the zju,wonderful campus!
plan to visit the westlake with my family and do meaningful things.
everything will be OK!
happy national day~
September 15 I'm gonna leave.Tomorrow my university life will begin, the day is finally coming.
A new city, new friends, everything is new. I’m busy packing my things up, so many things, and all kinds. I just want to bring my whole life there when facing that weak dormitory for four years, not feeling sad and lonely.
No complain, no explain. That was Hui’s emotion sign on QQ. Now I should read it several times, and do the same thing.
All said to me that the major ACCA can make a person very tired with its 14 global exams. The first year is a little easier, and then the three years will be filled with hard study. Now, it’s better for me to believe international accounting a good profession to release myself from terrible thoughts and pressure. Come on! There is the way.
I love this summer, free to do things I like, and without any sense of guilty. Goodbye to these happy and meaningful days, I’ll be waiting to have them again..
Suddenly Andrea jumps into my head. This lovely girl impressed me one and half years ago. We play and eat and chat together, though my oral English is poor. And Rachael, one of my English teachers in a course. She’s only 17 years old, god, even younger than me! But she looks so mature, and I envy her chance of getting a job a in foreign country and make money, when I have never known where to apply for a Chinese teacher…if I’m allowed to teach Chinese, my English standards must be very high, while foreign teachers who came here to teach English won’t have to learn any about Chinese. That’s the big difference.
Most classmates have started school, anyhow, they mostly feel fresh and happy. The same I wish to myself, and say bye to my dears and my home. August 29 my summerlong time again.
here's the place that is so easy to be forgotten.
i've been seeing classmates of high school begin their new life in universities of all kinds.suddenly i realised that my holiday will soon end.
these days my centural task is to practice my lute well,at my best,for i don't even know if i'll have the time and the chance and the idea and the mood to learn something new, to learn it with passion.
i'm lucky i think.although my teacher Ms Luo seems hard to put little time aside for me, i've found another one to teach me.we got to know each other more than three years ago,but in fact we haven't had any talks except on the bbs SS.but Soulsoil was closed.we were both the head of comic&animation part that time.she is one year older than me and we are schoolmates since middle school.i'm so regretful about my primary school time.if i had met a better teacher,not regard money as such important thing,i would have been much much much more skilled at not only lute ,but also something similar as chinese harp...like this JJ.she doesn't ask for tuition,i plan to give her a few nice presents to thank her~.
i decided to finish most of the animations which i didn't have time to see before.but my eyes have problem after watching for over ten hours nonstop several times,not feel comfortable.i'm a little worried about this and should be cautious with the eyesight.wolf's rain is the most attractive among all those.
opportunities of social activities are to rare to find.i'm eager to have,i hope my school is able to offer some good ones in future.and i only made so small amount of money from teaching with a bad memory,gosh! i'm hesitated about the second major i'll choose.i like japanese,but to be realistic, english and the law are the best two. i need more analysis,maybe using SWOT way,and recoments from experienced friends.
17 days free only.i should put theories into practice,say, read definite books,watch movies,draw pictures,play lute , go shoping with different friends,set up website,update blogs, go to english corner, have some meetings,get familiar with shanghai and hangzhou,listen to music......
after all,i'm still happy i've acomplish more than half of the items set down before.
July 15 Speak it out!today i went to the English corner for the second time,i found so many differences compared with last time!
i feel i just lack somrthing called confidence and courage,vocabulary is hard but not the key point.sometimes personality counts more.
i think i'm ready to make many friends .we talked freely for more than two hours,of course with different people.i stood there and forgot my legs! a girl told me that she had been there every sunday from middle school age,and so had many young girls,all familiar with a middle-aged man.he always arrange foreigners to the corner and introduce each other to talk whatever they want.a lovely man!we chat about his daughter and travelling.several years' nonstop,perseverance is so good a characteristic.
no cry about my university SHUFE,OK?almost everyone has regrets.learn to seise every chance from now on and make my own decision!
i began to teach math to a high school student at his home.40yuan for 2.5hours,and i have to pay another amount of money to the website which make this arrangement for me.in fact i don't care how much money i can earn,i smply want some experiences,better than staying at home,facing the computer screen and doing nothing.but it's not easy,he seems to have little interest in math.i hope his grades will be improved~
i'm eager to get the chance to communicate with the major,but it's hopeless by now.are there any other activities to take part in?i'm getting fatter than before,the most terrible thing i must deal with these days.but i can't refuse so much delicious food!maybe it means i can't enjoy life easily with no preasure...swimming made my legs hurt.no place to ski,so i decide to do rope skip...
to see a lot of movies and cartoons,draw some pictures,write something,set up my own website,read useful books,practice chinese lute,go shopping,take photos and design them,update my blog and space,travel,make friends,improve oral english and handwriting,become slin and more competitive,get used to vista......some of my holiday plans.to know what i really want,to overcome,and to accomplish all~
July 05 I am back!I'm back!!!
i lose words to express my excitement.dears,i'm really happy to see you here again!rst
the first surprise is that i saw BEAN,a friend disapearing three years ago which made me think that we'll never have the chance to meet again.but he just stayed there,on msn.he said he failed in the university entrance examinations so he didn't want to face his friends for some time.poor guy...say goodbye to his fudan just like me.well the school is just so-so anyway,not very bad in my view.
then i saw all the lovely spaces,some have been updating and some are deserted.though the speed is a bit slow,i still love here.
demi told me that she felt disappointed about her friends,me included,cauze' none of us decided to enter the universities in beijing.in fact we can get in touch with each other through msn,qq or cellphones,indeed.to take a back step,even if we will all be in beijing,how could we meet so influently simply the time we want?I don't think so.you were always on my mind these years and you are, and you will ,for good.many times when i face the science and darkness alone, your face rises up in my head,and before my eyes.nine years isn't a short period and it's unique,can't be replaced from memory.so it's quite unnecessary to worry about this,right?
i am doing nothing these days.the unfamiliarity with VISTA made things a little complex to achieve my goal.keeping downloading and watching and deleting,is that all my life now?i planed to say no,but difficult to realise in action.i hope to find a job on hometeaching,but it doesn't seem bright.what i can do is simply practice chinese lute ,read some books, watch TV and do nothing on the computer but pay large amounts of time.it's time to pick up my brush on wacom and real paper...do something meaningful to forget unhappiness.
CODE GEASS excellent!!i got a necklace from a comic magazine,how lucky!some of the movies are worth watching.start to watch the friends.
i wrote a fraction of the persons i want to say thank you to in http://rio-haruka.blogcn.com .i will write more later.my personal website is closed,i'm designing a new one.the first step is to master PS and PAINTER and COREL DRAW...
chances are taken and missed both by oneself.JUST GRAB IT!NO HESITATING!.looking forward to the sea...
July 08 Sorry,but it's time to say sorry.have you ever been yelled at by someone angrily?
of course almost everybody have had the horrible experience.but who can ensure he or she hasn't treated others in this awful way?
we hardly consider other people's mood when we are somehow at a impatient condition.i've thought i am doing well all the time by simply take myself to the position that others are in,but i found it not completely correct.
last satuaday i shouted at a mailman on the phone for the reason that he didn't deliver the magazine "science world"to my home.i spoke to him without thinking much.he came to pay back the money.first my father said to him to be more careful next time and needn't pay for the loss,but i suddenly grabed the phone and insisted that he come up six floors to give me the money.the voice was rude, i think,maybe it can't be recognised by someone familiar even.he didn't say a word while i was complaining about the bad service and swearing something undue at him like the interrogation of why not buy me a new magazine himself.father then went to open the door.he asked the man not to pay the fragmentary money.
but at the moment he left and father said he seemed poor and very hot full of perspirition,i regreted all that i had said and done.i feel terribly sorry because of my behavior.he was just a man who had done a little wrong out of the plan.i'm sure he wasn't on purpose.it's exactly certain but it's already enough.
anyone will do something wrong and nobody doesn't want to change and pay moe attention.why don't i forgive him like my father?he just told me that he was a medium build man in his fourties and quite laborious,perhaps he could use the money i didn't charge to buy some cold drink.i thought of his family at once and really want to say sorry to him ,to a busy work who had to bear a girl's abuse when much too tired.but there's no chance.i bothered about the thing too much.i should have a little bit more synpathy.i decided to wait near the mailbox,but i hadn't seen his face.
i'm afraid my heart is becoming slow and dull.i start to forget things and delicate feelings of life and think through problems less and less.yesterday i read about bi shuming's new article.her sentences made me think again.we all consider smile as an expression better than cry, but have we ever found the emotion behind the so-called smile?do we truly want to smile when the muscle of our faces inflexibly do?many people just have learned to automaticly smile,which contains more coldness than careness.the distance between people may be much longer among the sign without any feeling.no one is willing to be helpful.to some degree crying reaches reality more than smile.it's scary ,isn't it?i am afraid of loneliness and coldness and sensitive to them from very young.we should care about each other so that we can live with and through sadness and sorrow together.
my dear JCF(JUAN CARLOS FERRERO) and RAUL GONZALEZ,two spanish princes staying in sorrow,i can't help writing down your names but no more have the heart to say anything.i can support you for good,but how can you support yourselve,sad prince?i'm getting used to the grey result when everytime full of confidence and wish in the beginning.so sorry,but why?why can i only see the picture about your disappointment and head went down?have no choice to solve the problem?it's not anyone's fault.you are not sure yet,so am i.dear mosquito,i never kill any mosquito because of thinking about your success in the near future.raul,the time you kissed your marriage ring ,i felt like dropping cheerful tears,but god seemed to envy your short joy...
May 19 so many thingswhen i enter here now again,i associate the time covering my mind.
every time i appeal to write something down here,i always hesitate for long.
then i decided to put some hidden agendas which means inconvenient for relatived people to see.
though the atmosphere is quite cold,i wonder if it is necessary to record in english.the remaining reason for me to insist on is to have the page look in harmony and keep a seemingly respectable habbit.
on knowing that about half the term's work equals nothing,i was fairly depressed.in fact i have known the bad result in advance because of several incorrect operations.but i was too optimistic to solve them in time,i underrated the complex relationship between all the small things in the electrical roundway.but i finally refused to steal marks by simply taking other classmate's works.it's concerned to the principle of dealing with the world.i think i will save the radio,at least it includes my job.there's regret and the emotion of being no resigned to the points i got,i consider it more than an unforgetable lesson.
i was surprised at the incredibly low price of the fresh plums collected by the salers from the farmers in villages.a kilogram is only exchanged by 0.3RMB!horrible number!it looks obviously that the perspiration of the farmers all the year round is in vain but they have to obey the rules in order to reduce the loss.just feel very sympathetic but can't do anything to help.maybe this is why farmers don't want to be themselves now.
activities become various such as the performance of a script and class's chorus.nearly every noon rest is taken away to make preparations for competitions.the turn is also coming for our class to be on duty and we have to face the united exams of four subjects and at last the final exam.i found it a little boring to make arrangements for the play and get tired of little things which have not been thought of.borrowing the stage for a moment needs three person' signitures...and things went wrong out of the consideration.the position of every cast proved to be the most important which linked to the effect when the stage is large.there are perhaps problems that are concealed from the surface.just wish all to be their better.
the exams which brings a part of the students the key to universities are nearer.it's part of the life experiences so everyone is to pass it and wants to win.the grade three in our high school is leaving to study at home and receive warm cares.one must adjust the mental state ,calm the heart down to the horizon and think less.CX,FLY,i have trust in you!
the results of recent tests are not ideal enough.i was not able to grasp the limited time accurately.i'll search for ways to make changes of this sort of situation.please don't lose self-confidence and go on with effort and spirit.^^
something delicate can assist to help tell people with different souls.i believe kind-hearted guys will gain happy endings.
March 31 feelings about things surroundedevery time when i enter here,i always feel time is rushing away from me like fast stream.
almost two months passed after the new semester,things begin to get a little bit more complicated,between study and study,people and people.
one biology class mr king made us work on a complex problem about the rate of inheritance.i didn't have the interest to do it indeed,but what i didn't expect was that king went close to me and asked in a gentle voice:"do you work it out,chenq?"suddenly i lost my lines to reply to him.i knew i was really embarrassed and shamefaced at the moment,i could only say slightly no.of course i saw the disappointing expression on king's face.he was often so kind to me and i was quite moved when he called out my name.
it accurs to the scene when i was in middle school.ms cheung,my etecher on the night of saturday,encouraged me when i complained to her in the homework article that the pressure was so heavy as silk wrapping me over,she just wrote down simple sentences on my book,"......it's no doubt that you can go to the best school!"though these were little to her,simply a few seconds, but it was really a great power to me.when things remind me of this,tears will come out.
there are much thankness i hold in order to remember those who did little but help me a lot,esp teachers.they are lovely,like ms wang,ms fu,ms liu,ms cheung,ms yuan,mr king,mr shao,mr huang,mr kee and so on.maybe they are for ever the strong force for me to study along.i like imagining what it may be like when i am successful enough to go back to see them.
last week i happened to see ms xu online.we chatted for a while.she read my space and said she loved it.i was tremendously happy!i also felt sorry because i rarely listen to eclass carefully...yesterday when eclass started,my tears burst out silently.i recognised that ms xu is a kind and good teacher,too,what support her to give class to us when we use this sort of attitude towards her...i'm sorry,ms xu.
i like the smile of ms wang,not that much beautiful,but warm.
sometimes it's hard to please everyone.have you ever considered the real heart of your so-called friends?we all have masks to face different kind of people,but disguise much made me tired of the game,but i still have to play inside.some relationship is delicate beyond one's mind.the balance should no be broken,at least now.
everybody has his or her own thoughts of the mental separation.when friends fall out, the hurt is not the same.i went to the top room of our school one noon,writing down sth.i know clearly what i'm doing now and what i'm going to do.
i wish i could have a chance to see cx,fly and sk.i have just known the story of cx.she got so deep scar of heart.may she feel better and hopeful now.
hong,you should also go ahead~i'll be always making an effort together with you in the distance~
February 24 i'm within now?say yes!i couldn't sleep well in school . the more i worried about the quality of sleeping,the worse it seemed to be.then i got quite sick , tremendously uncomfortable and my head stood great pain,it was hard for me to keep sitting for a while...my attention was not able to consentrate on the study work.all was in a mess...
the subjects are a little complecated at the begining of the term,and i felt as if i am not prepared for what i should do as a high school student in grade two.i am now the monitor of the class.there are a lot of jobs waiting for me to settle...but i've confidence.i'll try my best to do things perfectly.i can't miss the chance.
i hope i'll be within the situation soon.i must have a proper mental state. January 20 three days' time with special friendsi'm still so happy now.i consider it as a really precious experience for me getting to know them!! KRISTA , ANDREA , KIM , MEGAN , EMILY P&B , JOHANNE , KRIS , AMY , BOB , PETER~you're pretty friendly and lovely guys^^
i had to get up early in the morning to take 40 minutes' bus and then walk for nearly 30 minutes to get to the university from the busstop.there is always walking,it's tired really,but there's no complain. it's well worth doing so,actually,from my heart.we went to the silk museum,yan'an road,bank of china with peter,the west lake and make dumplings,drawing chinese water color and experience the calligraphy together.it was such a happy time that i'll never forget.but i am sorry that some of them felt sick during the three days.perhaps because of the bad weather ,or the food we ate,or the different climate.anyway,they are very afraid of the things like dumplings now and don't dare to have any snacks in zhiweiguan..then we found hard to choose what we eat for supper ,for the restaurant which is famous for its truditional snacks hasn't got many types of common dishes and what's more,they're usually much too oily...i know their stomach are not comfortable but we had no better choice...so it seemed that they didn't enjoy the dinner very much but the atmosphere among the table was good .everyone was smiling i think. it's a pity that i didn't take enough photos!!their expressions on face are all cute!talking with krista,andrea and kim was my great pleasure~i've learned much details of their daily life in America and also eager to make chocolate cakes and apple pies by myself!!andea showed great interest in the two-storey bus and was surprised by the cheap price.she's a pretty and active girl.she left me deep impression and she told me she's good at sports,like basketballs and so on.it's admirable~she looks energetic when going shopping,but didn't feel well today.maybe she's too tired.she just spent a little while with us along the lake.i was tremendously unwilling to part with her so earlier and of course everybody later.we probably won't have chance to see each other in future.i asked for all their e-mail address but i'm afraid i will not get much time on writing.i'll manage,just try my best to keep in touch...i don't want to miss friends really,though it's only three days'time.i'll treasure. peter and his wife are kind.bob with long golden yellow hair looks just like a musician.it's cool.jo said to me :" daisy,you're artistic!"i felt excellent when hearing this,i don't think i did a good job on calligraphy,i just learned a little before,but i felt highly honoured they like it.i wrote the chinese translation of peter's and five girls' name for the with brush and ink.it's interesting when we learnt how to draw plum and orchid blossom and watch the chinese clothes made of silk like qipao.but this morning ,the speech given by a professor about the development of chinese rural area was partly boring and too slow.we intended to watch a big movie "the promise" it's delayed by the key problem.peter was curious about the silkworm and seemed excited when we said that we all kept silkworm babies the see the process of the growing until a moth.he's lovely... in America people don't use bike as a transportation tool.they just use it for fun,exercise or thrilling activity.there's not bike way in the street.almost each family member has his or her own car.and farmers use machines to harvest the corns.it's convenient.there're often several children in one family and they can play together to escape from the loneliness,but we can't because of the population policy.students also have much homework to do in school but they have more free space.the same as us,their efficiency at school is higher than at home.there're so many temptation around home.they also like to eat fried things like chips but don't care much about the skin and weight problem because they're just ok and take enough sports.when they talked about pies and pancakes they cook at home, i was swallowing my saliva!!it sounds nice and delicious as if i had already tasted it!!i wish i could have a chance to try~ kim gave me a tight hug at last.it made my heart extremely warm at the moment.i can still feel the temperature.i was moved by her warmth.her voice is nice.i especially like it.every friend kept waving their arms to say goodbye to us when we were going to separate,there was sadness in my mind.but i can only think of smiles on their beautiful faces.~ YAOchunjun is sometimes with us,coco,jenny,jason,edison and me .he's an outstanding senior student at zhejiang university of technology and works as the chairman of the students' union.he's very tall 188cm and a little handsome....~ i'm trying to record everything down here when the memories are still fresh.i'd like to keep the vivid vista always on my mind.thank you,kim,krista johanne and emily,i'll put your feelings which are written on my notebook carefully in my drawer and remain them as treasures,or a kind of souvenir with true sensation . later some pictures will be uploaded here.andrea,will you come to have a look at my space?you can leave a message if you like.i'll miss you all,dears~_~ November 11 half cutexams for three days.
full of uncertain matters.
feel tremendously exhausted.
just wish me good luck.god prays!
is it really autumn?i can't really tell.wjen i suddenly saw the yellow leaves i considered it unreal.
the sthength of life is not to give in.
November 03 autumn feelingi always write so long a diary unconsciously,because i don't get many chances to update my space here,you see,it's already November now,a month passed so quickly that it didn't wait for me to record sonething down...
school sports meeting finished,i was just a viewer as a person with poor body skills.but i attend the discus throwing...just for fun...the teacher had no idea on me...the sun was dazzling,but guys who attend the race of 1500m and 3000m is well worth inspiring.
in the opening of the meeting,when teams of every class went on,i unexpectedly wanted to shed tears...usually no feelings about classmates and the most common things around me,but when it's time to say bye,when i sink into the imagination of leaving apart,i am always easy to think till too far from now to reach the edge.
two days is a short moment, i can even touch my regret of wasting time when the autumn holiday is over.i know i should be prepared for the mid-exam.but i still can't pull myself away from the computer screen...maybe i 'll have to go to the library,but i wouldn't like to...
teachers are all so good that no achievement and progress means i haven't try my best to spare every effort.it will all be my own fault.when i call up the memories of ms Cheung,mr Ji,ms Lee,mr Huang and mrs Liu,i'll feel very tremendously sorry for them,and also for myself.they are so kind to me...what am i doing?!
do the right things at the right time,never feel regrettable again.
October 01 holidays finally comeoften feel lone without reason...want to cry,but nowhere to rest on...
the first month at school seems quite long for me , first seven days busy doing blackboard works and things on duty,then the task of exercises for body-building gymnastics came along just puting into the seam of poor little time during our study life..we went out to buy the clothes for the competition and different ideas about the style from all members made us tired of persuading, mood also went down as the students' union's delinquency and the teacher's favoritism for the excuse......
finally i resigned the job after thinking a lot more.no use and meaning and caring,just form...class culture? i did't agree.i believe no pains ,no gains,but i paid much of my spirit and energy but gained nothing..the only thing that makes me a little consolated is that some FRIENDS (there i'd like to say "friends" instead of "classmates") are ready to help me,i should say THANK YOU to them.the work has nothing to do with study,it certainly can be forgotten.not nobody knows, but nobody really cares.
days keep hot , the time in classroom without a piece of wind let me feel the the sense of intolerability,and same there in dorm...one monday i took showers three times..longing for the holiday since the beginning of the term.
no updating for such a long time ,'cos i didn't know what to begin with and indeed no time for me to write on my blog much in English, i couldn't calm down myself easily those days , the recollection would make me even sad...hidden agenda started to be clear out of the smog.true faces of some guys turned out to be really abominable and selfish.tears were sheded frequently and silently..typing in Chinese is fast and don't have to think much,but i 'd like to keep this environment.only at http://rio_haruka.blogcn.com had something new, not much.
little conersation between my deskmate i feel as if my speaking ability will go down..her words made me uncomfortable often,for she is always thinking about herself . when she needs you ,she'll change into another shape smiling and even her voice too sweet...i can't negate the truth that everybody is willing to bring more to himself,but she's out of degree.i remains my friendly manner to her and tries to be polite.sometimes i really want to say shit words or raise my voice,but i didn't .if i had done so,i would have been a person like her...though the wearing tight shorts doesn't suit my heart,i didn't complain a word..i know it's a collective activity but she seemed not .
still no plan for the holiday,but many ideas of what to do... carnival , barbecue......a few days in hometown...hope the weather get cooler and interesting things on mountains will waiting for me..i'd like to take and deal with some pictures , watch animation and all kinds of words freely , say goodbye to GSD which has been on air for one year...compared with seed,it looks a little pale on the plot,the main characters are not arranged carefully enough in my opinion.i 'd give my wish to runa,also her CV MAAYA.these are my desired happiness now...
i met Hui on QQ yesterday.she's already back from NANJING university.she said again that hangzhou and NO.2 high school is better than anywhere else...she can't agree more. environment and things there are poor...but her sign is no complain,no explain...i think she won't regret her choice.i don't have any strong feeling about school life till now,but they say nothing lasts forever,you'll soon find the advantage when you leave the thing that is considered as a very odinary feature and pay little attention to it for a long time.i'll learn to treasure what i have now.
just forget the sucky homework ,also a headaching science job..and tests after holiday...how boring the rarely days for rest full of undertaking work and pressure would be...a classmate is going to JiuZhaiGou for a tour,what a lucky guy!!
i want to create a short fiction recording down my beautiful dream which is so genuine and close to me and go out any where with dorm friends if time permits...^^
first try the background picture...the girl is lost in deep thoughts or feeling her heart in her own world,like me...just O.K.i love this kind.hope you like this feeling ,too.
at last, happy NATIONAL DAY!
August 17 windfalls◎it is a day-dream if thinking only without action,but a nightmare if action wth no thoughts.
◎seize the day,begin now,coz' every day is a new life.
◎one day is worth two tomorrow.
◎cease to struggle and you cease to live.
◎life is a leaf of paper,white,there on each of us may write his word or two.
◎love is a song without words,one must feel it with his soul;love is an endless path,one must walk on through his life.
PS. will it keep raining ?can the cat see the light of hope... August 12 All About Lily Chou-Chou<by Andrew O'Hehir>
All About Lily Chou-Chou," a sprawling and adventurous tale of teen alienation, might just be the movie that pushes the Japanese new wave out of the film-geek ghetto. Or not. Like "Eureka," "All About Lily Chou-Chou" is arguably too ambitious, too all-encompassing and too concerned with flouting narrative convention for its own good. Then again, some of the same criticisms could apply to François Truffaut's "The 400 Blows," a movie that bears more than a passing similarity to this one. As that comparison suggests, I loved "All About Lily Chou-Chou" despite its problems, or at least I greatly admired its crystalline, high-definition video look, its explosive feel, its wealth of ideas, its willingness to go anywhere and do anything. If your taste runs to "difficult" films you absolutely can't miss it. (At this point, its United States release consists of one theater in Manhattan, so many of you may have to wait for home video.) Writer-director Shunji Iwai is no kid (he's 39), but his movie has a youthful restlessness, an almost compulsive daring. It won't make any difference to American viewers, but the film itself is actually a continuation of a sort of online soap opera Iwai launched in Japan. For all that, the film's basic outline isn't especially confusing: "All About Lily Chou-Chou" is mainly the story of Yuichi (Hayato Ichihara), a moody, near-silent teenage boy who's obsessed with a pop singer named, yep, Lily Chou-Chou. Beyond that, though, things get murky. Scenes don't always occur in chronological order, and some remain entirely mysterious. Two characters are killed and another is raped, and on all three occasions we basically have to infer (or guess) what has happened. For a while another boy, a charismatic, cruel James Dean type named Hoshino (Shugo Oshinari), seems to become the main character. Then there's a long sideways journey in the middle, when the film temporarily becomes a homemade video of an Okinawa vacation that ends with a near-drowning while the camera sloshes around haphazardly in the surf. Iwai's portrait of Japanese high-school life is dense with compelling detail. In between his sessions in an online chat-room devoted to Lily -- rendered as a series of explosive intertitles that interrupt and sometimes overlay the action -- Yuichi must navigate a landscape of warring bullies and gangs, sadistic and seductive packs of girls and various grades of clueless, harried adults. Ichihara is a handsome, slight kid who can simultaneously convey curiosity and sullenness. If Yuichi is pretty much the classic wounded adolescent of world cinema, transposed to the age of chat rooms and digital video, that doesn't stop us from pining for a time when he will be less awkward and his life a little easier. Indeed, as we gradually piece together, Yuichi is full of unresolved longing for a long-haired girl named Kuno (Ayumi Ito), a classical pianist who favors Debussy and is herself a pariah among the bitchy girl-cliques. I may be misinterpreting some of the ambiguous information in "All About Lily Chou-Chou," but it seems as though Kuno sat next to Yuichi one day in school and introduced him to Lily's music, but he's never gotten up the courage to talk to her since (although they may have communicated pseudonymously online). Like most of the film's characters, Kuno is eventually victimized by the dashing bully Hoshino, an enigmatic character who is cruel and violent without seeming entirely unsympathetic. If the narrative progress of Iwai's film is sometimes baffling, what keeps you watching are his lustrous images and the complexity of his portrayal of middle-class Japan in decline. "Lily Chou-Chou" is clearly another entry in the cinema of globalization, whose main subject is the arrival of rapid change -- especially crime, social dislocation and the rise of commercial culture -- in previously traditional societies. I have no way of knowing whether its depiction of high school as an anarchic zone of terror, prostitution and bloodletting is more fact than fantasy, but the movie certainly dislodged my preconception that juvenile delinquency in Japan would be mild by Western standards. I've never been bothered by the graininess and unstable color palette of digital video, especially as it is used by directors at the artier, or at least cheaper, end of the moviemaking spectrum. Iwai is almost certainly going digital by choice; he begins and ends the film with images of Yuichi against a field of sizzling-green grass, an electric hue perhaps only attainable in this format. He even films scenes at night, in which the characters react naturalistically to the single bright light atop his video camera, blinking and shielding their eyes. Somehow it works. I suppose "All About Lily Chou-Chou" is at its heart making the oldest possible complaint about modern culture: that as it purports to bring people together it actually keeps them separate. Iwai isn't interested in Lily herself, who never appears in the film (and may not even be real); Lily and her pseudo-mystical domain, "the Ether," seem to symbolize a lost tranquility that may be the past or the future but definitely isn't the here and now. Just as Yuichi can never talk to Kuno, the saucy Shiori (Yu Aoi), who's being pimped out to salarymen by Hoshino, can never tell Yuichi how much she likes him. About halfway through this puzzling, intermittently brilliant film, there's a scene that seems to summarize its themes of frustrated longing and unfulfilled desire. Yuichi is assigned by Hoshino to walk Shiori home, and she spends the whole trip repeatedly kicking him, and then races off the path to plunge into a muddy irrigation canal. When they reach her house, she stands dripping in the driveway while Yuichi shuffles away. On opposite sides of the hedge, they both lurk for a few moments, gazing at the ground, each hoping the other will do or say something. We can see them, from a distance, but they can't see each other. August 09 regular lifei get up at7:00a.m. every day in the morning and have my breakfast
after my parents leave home,i begins to go online and scan some websites and forums like seed,soso,greedland ,rahxephon,other spaces and so on
then i watch animation for about 7 hours in daytime,rewatch or have something fresh,like last exile,fullmetalalchemist,seed,conan,honey&clover...
at about 5:00p.m.i watch tv for two hours while reading daily newspaper.
i read fictions borrowed from library and some magazines for the rest time
i go to sleep at about 11:00p.m.
too lazy..i know,but still feel tired ,meaningless and in failure
i know the bad result if my parents find out what i'm doing these days...
i know i was in bad condition...shit..
i know there's something important i can find in the animation and books that will be useful to fire myself up...
hope some near day i can be sober to restrain myself to put most of my mind into study..i couldn't wish all,just let me feel full instead of emptiness inside...
i'd like to make some progress...
good good study,day day up,sounds really nice...
August 02 job of paintinglast night i painted a painting...mom is so happy to see me hold up the drawing pens after half year...
it's about some roses and books...not carefully..shortcomings are filled in the page__the color is too grey...the fruit looks not fresh..the outline is not clear...i must try more...but mom like it...she said she feel good...
reading fictions all the time...don't want to move even...i'm in decadence...
with much work to do...i know the words "i should" take no effects on me...
tense can let you down,also up,if you can change it into impetus__from <diary of Yingzi>
i'm not sure if the story is true,but the girl is admirable,full of courage and wisdom.
PS,Maaya' new picture!!looking as if not a photo...i can feel the brush and pigments...
the PL sd dolls make me want to have them so much...but too dear...about 3000dollars..i'm dreaming=_=
August 01 background music&the question of da vinci codesuccessfully added it !it's the main BGM of the animation movie__the place we promised in our early days...graceful pure melody ,the violin!!~enjoy it*_*but it may need waiting for a little while...
just finished reading the da vinci code...so incredible..who can tell me whether the history material through the plot of this fiction is ture or not!!! i didn't find any special meaning mentioned in the story when i payed all my attention carefully looking at the great paintings by the genius da vincy before!!! July 30 uselessi found the english writing on the space is useless for my language improvement...istilll cannot use some useful phrases or sentenses even remember them...but i stiil want to insist on...no why,just want it,and just do it
today i changed the version of space...all are leaves...the main colors are my favourite__green and orange...warm really...let me forget loneliness for a little while
friends are so few here...missing you all the time... |
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